Since I'm participating in Inktober this year, I figure I'll keep a log of all of the art here. Stay tuned daily in October to see more images! You can also view these images on my Twitter or Instagram
October 1: Modern Witch
October 2: Flower Witch
October 3: Hipster Witch
October 4: Whoops! Missed this day
October 5: High Tea Witch
October 6: Flying Witch
October 7: FAMILY TIME
October 8: FAMILY TIME
October 9:Eye Witch
October 10: Mushroom Witch
October 11: Bunny Witch
October 12: Jack O' Lantern Witch:
October 13: Fall Witch
October 14: FAMILY TIME
October 15: FAMILY TIME
October 16: Cat Witch
I know I dont pop in here as much ;;;;; Mostly, I'm super busy with Gaia Online work and my son so I dont art as much as I'd like. BUT, Im still attending conventions and I'll be at Fanime next week!
Ill also be attending the Gaia Panel on Saturday! If you see a lady with half blue/half pink hair, thats me! Come by and say hello!
Hey guys! Recently I was hired to illustrate a children's book written by NYT Bestseller Ellie Ann and published through Castor Books. Yesterday, we launched a Kickstarter to help with some little bits of funding. The book is for K-2 and is a fantasy themed reader!
The book I am illustrating is called ROOK!
"ROOK is about a cunning young thief who takes whatever she wants. But one day, she steals from the wrong witch and she's caught! The witch takes her in, and teaches her how to create, not take."
ROOK is just one of three books on this Kickstarter. The writer, Ellie, saw a serious lack of fantasy/adventure themed readers when looking for them for her own children. She also noticed a serious lack of diversity and representation in the genre so on top of being fantasy themed, the books also feature POCs, a non-binary protagonist and even a character with two dads!
If this interests you in anyway, please consider contributing. If you can't contribute then please share like crazy! Thanks so much! <3
Castor Easy Reader Kickstarter
Anyway! I hope to see you there! <3
Yep. Only 3 weeks after leaving the hospital with my son, I end up back in the hospital again. I talk about the full story here: setsuna22.tumblr.com/post/1437…
But, long story short: I started having really bad hunger on Tuesday but every time I ate, I got really bad pain that would radiate to my back. It got bad enough that I pretty much stopped eating altogether and was just drinking ensures. On Sunday, I thought I was getting better so I made the mistake of eating some solid food which ended up knocking me on my ass. I finally bit the bullet and went to the ER. After some blood work and an ultrasound, they found out that my gallbladder was the culprit. I had gallstones and some had moved into my bile duct which was blocking off my pancreas as well so they were worried about pancreatitis. So, I had to have an endoscopy to remove the stones from the bile duct and then I had to have my gallbladder removed.
Unfortunately, I didn't want to expose Desi to sick people so I had to leave him at home. my husband just so happened to be out of town as well (of course, because it couldn't happen when he was home lol) so my mother and sister took care of the baby while I was in the hospital. But, now I am home and reunited with Desmond. I'm doing much better especially since I can actually eat again! I'm just really sore from having two abdominal surgeries in less than a month. @___@ Luckily, my hubby will be home tomorrow so I'll be able to rest a bit more when he gets back.
Here is a little bit about his birth, if you are interested:
I woke up at 6am Sunday, April 3rd and had noticed a gush of fluid when I got up. Obviously, my first thought was that my water might of broken but it wasn't a ton of liquid so I wasn't sure. So, I sort of passed the time trying to figure out if it was and in that time I noticed a few instances of bad hip pain that came and went. I knew that Desi was posterior/sunny side up (which means his face and body are facing towards the front of my body. The ideal birth position is to have his face facing my back) so I knew I would probably have back labor. So, I finally decided to just call my midwife around 7:30am and after I explained everything to her she said "it sound like we might be having a baby today!" And told me she would stop by my house shortly to check on me. When she came by an hour or so later, I was having 30 second contractions about 6-7 minutes apart. She checked me and I was 4cm dilated and 80% effaced. She left and would come back when my contractions were longer, stronger and closer together. Around 10:30 am, my contractions were 60 seconds long and 4-5 minutes apart so my husband had my midwife come back and she arrived around 11:30. I spent the next several hours laboring naturally at home. At first, the pain was manageable by deep breathing but at some point I had to moan to get through them. We also set up a pool for me to labor in and that helped quite a bit. Again, it was all back labor so the pain was the absolute worst lower back and hip pain that you could imagine, like someone is putting them into a vice. It was so bad that I could only labor on all fours or lying down, I tried to stand or squat but my legs would give out during contractions. I also barely ever opened my eyes the whole time I was in labor, I was very much in my own world and I was also managing to snooze the tiniest bit between contractions. Around 5 or 6pm, my midwife checked me again sand I was 6cm and 100% effaced. After this, my contractions got extremely intense and also irregular. I would have a smaller contraction and then a break (where I would manage to fall asleep) that would be followed by 2 or 3 extremely intense contractions, back to back. So, I would be having essentially a 3-5 minute contraction. Around 10pm, my midwife gave me the option to check my progress again and I decided to go ahead and do so. I was only 7cm at that point so I hadn't progressed much in 5 hours. At that point, my midwife laid out some options for me: she admitted that she felt that I had a pretty large baby and a small pelvis and that she was hoping that my body would adjust and that nature would take over as it often does. She said that she could break my water (it never did actually break) and we could wait an hour or so to see how I progress from there or we could head to the hospital and use pitocin to try to speed things along and there I would have the option for pain medication as well. My pain was already an 8-10 on the pain scale and breaking my water would just make my contractions more intense so I wasn't willing to do that without medication since I was at my limit after 16 hours of natural labor. My husband said after the fact that he was super scared for me and even cried a few times because he could see how much pain I was in and was worried about me. (Not that I ever knew, he was completely calm in my presence) So, we opted for the hospital.
When we got to the hospital, I was asked if, since I was a home birth, I would want pain medication. They offered me Fentanyl or an epidural. Fentanyl is a shot but only works for 30 minutes at a time and also has to be stopped at some point close to delivery because it can drug the baby. I didn't want that because it would only work for a short while and I would be screwed when I progressed because I wouldn't be able to take any more and I'd be too far along for an epidural. So, I opted for the epidural and my husband said there was an immediate change in me. After the epidural, they broke my water, put in an internal fetal monitor and observed the baby and my contractions for an hour or so. They saw with several of my contractions that Desi's heart rate was dropping so they were not willing to use pitocin for that reason. They checked me again and realized that Desmond did not have his chin tucked and was looking straight forward instead, also he was -3 station. (Station works as follows: a 0 station is when the baby's head is all the way in the pelvis while +2 station is when the baby is crowning. So, -3 means he was no where near being ready to come out.) So, really, my only real option was to get a C-Section.
So yeah, my labor did not exactly go as planned but I'm kosher with that. I knew going in to labor that there are no guarantees and even though I wanted a natural, unmedicated home birth, I always knew that circumstances change and that a C-Section was never out of the picture. I am really proud of the 18 hrs of labor that I did do naturally, I was pushed to my limit and came through and I also have a beautiful son because of it!
So, I am nearing the end of my pregnancy. I am 36 weeks/9 months pregnant now. I have two more commissions left and am trying my damndest to get as much work done for Denver Comic Con as I can in between. I've grown HUGE the past two weeks:
I've also been having Braxton Hicks quite a bit and some other signs that I might go into labor early. He needs to wait one more week though so that I can have him at home, as planned.
Anyway, I will probably be gone on a haitus for a few months after he's born, so just expect to not see me much.
If you are interested in a commission (I've been having people ask) I am happy to take them, but just realize that you will probably not see it until June, July or even August. If you are interested, let me know! (I could definitely use your business!)
I am Finishing up my last commission from my first round so I am ready to start another! If you are interested, please PM me or email at email@example.com. I'm taking commissions to help with getting ready for baby setsuna in a few months!
They will be $40 and in the style as shown below. Nice, simple waist-ups with transparent BGs.
Speaking of pregnancy, everything is going well. I am 22 weeks at this point. Huy and I found out we are having a boy, who will be named Desmond. Still working on that middle name though.
I might be drumming up commissions again soon. I was thinking just simple ones, like the image I just submitted; simple waist-ups.
Anyway, hopefully I'll continue posting some more stuff and I'll try to get back into Patreon again. I have been working on art, but it's mostly been stuff that I am not allowed to share at this point.
DCC went really well! I am already signed up for next year to sell again
I started a new job right after DCC and it's been keeping me SUPER busy! I am working at a hotel in Estes Park, CO. (Where the Stanley Hotel a la The Shining is located, in case you didn't know!) I was originally hired as a Sip N Paint instructor (so I teach painting and you can drink in the class ) but I also work the Front Desk. Estes is not a ski town so the summer is their busy season which is why I've been working so much. But the busy season is closing and I will pretty much only be doing Sip N Paint during the winter which will open me up for arts again.
Outside of that, I've had another major life change!
My first trimester ends next week! But, obviously the first trimester is rough, lots of worrying for one. But I've also been dealing with morning sickness (which lasts all day, not just the morning, what a lie! lol) and the most epic fatigue I have ever felt. So, if I'm not working, Im pretty much sleeping or laying on the couch, too tired to move. lol. But luckily, the baby looks good thus far so it looks like I'll be carrying this one full term.
My due date is April 1, 2016
Anyway, I will be posting some art sometime in the next month or so hopefully!
In case you haven't figured it out yet, I am going to be at Denver Comic Con this weekend. At booth I38. I am also going to be at Mile Hi Comics on Friday night from 4-10pm for a Preview Night they are hosting.
This is my first, big comic convention and I'm a little nervous but also excited about it. Nervous because I did a small one once and was treated really badly. The only person who was halfway decent to me was Zach Howard (who is actually a guest at DCC this weekend). Everyone else though made it abundantly clear that it was a boy's club that I wasn't allowed in and didn't really give me the time of day. I'm sure I won't have that issue at DCC, but I still worry that I might not do well.
Anyway, I am also cosplaying for the first time on Saturday! I was a Steampunk Catwoman for Halloween and I fully plan on wearing the same outfit at DCC. I hope that goes over well as well. @___@ huuuuuu;;;;
If any of you are coming down then please come by and say Hello! <3
This is sort of related to Easter but not (because I didnt get them for that reason) but I recently got 4 chicks! I got them because I am allowed to have up to 6 hens at my house and I want them for eggs and bug control. (And as pets a bit too lol) I had 3 chickens when I was younger and have wanted them ever since for myself. I finally moved to my new house last fall and I am allowed to have chickens (and is just something that apparently everyone does around here, as chickens are for sale at the local hardware store and pet stores lol) so I am taking my opportunity now
Anyway, I got 2 Blue Cochins and 2 Golden Wyandotte chicks. They are 2 weeks old now. Here they are!
This is Iris
First of all, I ALWAYS update my DA and Tumblr and so on with my most recent work. I give it to you in all it's glory. Yes, it's relatively low res, but I don't give you parts or fractions of it. I post it even though I get terrible feedback and response on it. On DA, I am lucky to get more than 5 comments an image and I'm lucky to get more than 100 faves. I have almost 9 thousand watchers here. On Tumblr, my REALLY good posts get 100 or so reblogs, but my average art post gets around 10 to 50 maybe. I have almost 700 followers there. Those are not great percentages. And I understand that that issue is everyone's right now on DA but I experience it across the board on all outlets. BUT, I post anyway because I like sharing my art. And even though I have a Patreon now, nothing will change. Except I will maybe not post EVERY SINGLE piece of art I make, but I'm still going to be posting 90% of it for everyone to see and enjoy.
With that being said, I also need to make a living. I just got laid off from my 9-5 art job. I went from making 35K+ a year to 0. Art is my only real job skill and art jobs like what I had, here in Colorado, are few and far between. I don't live in a state like California where that sort of work is more readily available.
As far as my income endeavors go: I offer commissions and no one ever buys them unless I greatly reduce the price to like $20. And even then I get maybe 5-10 if I'm lucky. I put up merchandise on Storeenvy or Society6 and I have grossed a total of $10 from both in the past year. I also do work on Etsy, but that nets me about $100 a month or two months. I do several conventions a year and never make profit. I can't pay my mortgage or buy groceries with that. But, sites like Patreon give me a real, fighting chance to survive financially.
So, I'm sorry if it offends you that I post something like this. But I have to advertise myself or I'll never get any sort of business. I think people forget that behind that art you like, is someone who is trying to make a living to get by. Sure, there are several big artists on Patreon that are making THOUSANDS a month there. But a majority of us are just trying to scrape by with the few hundred bucks or less we might get, living paycheck to paycheck as it were. Complaining that we might not post all of our art for free anymore is sort of the same as me saying "Why doesn't so and so work for free anymore and let me watch? It's so unfair to me when they ask to get paid!".
Either way, I would hope that my fans would be happy to see I have a Patreon now and/or support me in the endeavor. Because, Patreon is going to force me to draw atleast one new image a week instead of one every several months like you've been seeing for the past several years. Me getting paid on Patreon is going to get you and my Patrons more content and I'll be able to maybe not foreclose on my new house; it's a win-win.
TL;DR- I need to make money somehow so Patreon is my best way to do it right now. It's also the best way for me to submit more work. And I will still be submitting art for free on top of the paid stuff and won't be forcing you to go to Patreon.
Now on to another issue this brings up for me. In general, the lack of response on my art really digs into my self-esteem and my artistic process. I wish it didn't but it does. Part of the reason I don't post much was because I working in the art field the past few years. And anyone who has done that knows that working on your own stuff is hard when you art for other people all day.
But besides that, I generally have this crippling fear that I am not good enough. I can't sell commissions for full price. I can't make a profit at cons. I can't get people to share my work online. My only reasoning for this is that people don't like my art enough and I can't even pinpoint why that is. It's not even necessarily that I believe my art is shit or anything because I don't. I am a modest person but I do know that my skill is above average. But I see people that I consider on the same level as me and I see them be wildly successful and I can't figure out why. I'm sure the success portion is mostly due to my lack of activity, but still, it doesn't explain doing poorly at cons and the like. And I leave most cons feeling like a loser, artistically.
So, with that being said, it really cripples my artistic process. I lose HOURS of work time just staring at what I've made, worrying that it's terrible. I have a hard time doing the next part of the piece because I'm worried it won't be good enough. Because of this, something as simple as lining a sketch can take days or I will start an image 20 or 30 times and not finish it. When I do finish it and submit it to DA or Tumblr, or my boss, or my commissioner or whatever, I have the worst anxiety that they will hate it entirely. And because of ALL of that, my motivation to draw is minimal. My inspiration is stifled. It effects my ability. At it's worst, it's almost like I can't remember how to draw anymore. I draw the worst shit when I know I can do better. Even with my Patreon right now, Im worried my prices are too high because my art isn't worth it. But at the same time I know that my art is good and I shouldn't sell myself short. Its just causing this giant internal struggle.
These fears have also ruined work for me. As you all know, I worked with Gaia Online for almost 3 years. The whole time I was there, not only did I struggle with this but I also struggled with my health which made my brain mush. It got me into trouble but after I started getting treated for my illness, things got better I felt. And unfortunately, during their layoffs, I was included. Really, about 90% of the contract staff was laid off, so it was understandable and I didn't take it harshly. But, this past year at Fanime I found out that a majority of the people who had been laid off had been hired back. I was one of the very few that wasn't (even though I was assured that I would be, if it was possible). On top of that, people who I felt were my friends there and who I had hung out with every year before seemed to avoid me at all costs. I would ask them if we could hang out after con and they would tell me that they had other plans. Which was fine and I didn't think anything of it until I found out they invited one of my friends who sat next to me all con. (So, it wasn't like they couldn't of hopped over to the next table and invite me as well, if they wanted to) And it just hurt. It hurt deep and it still does today. And I'm sure they didn't mean it that way and I don't fault them for it because it's probably all in my head but it hurts the same. And I don't know, I can't help but feel all of that is connected to my art. Like, I'm not in the "cool club" artwise and I'm not good enough artistically to work for Gaia so I don't deserve their friendship anymore.
Anyway, I don't even know why I am sharing this with you all. But I just felt the need to. And I'm really hoping that being on Patreon will help with some of this. Because atleast if I'm being paid to submit content each week, then I will be forced to do it. And hopefully it will help with some of my issues. I don't know, maybe if I don't get a lot of patrons then it'll just hit my self-esteem worse. But, I still have to try.
TL;DR- I struggle with self-esteem issues with my art and my relationship with others in the art community. I worry that my art is shit because it doesn't sell and because I get minimal response to it online. I'm hoping Patreon will fix some of my self-esteem issues with my art.
Hey guys! So I know a lot of you showed interest in purchasing my amongst wolves tee (but I couldn't sell them since they were for a convention). Well, now is your chance to purchase one if you want it! I need to get atleast 12 people who are interested before I can put in an order.
The shirt is $25, screen printed on ultra soft T-shirts. I can get you any size you need. Let me know if you are interested then I'll get payment from you once I have 12 people. Thanks!!
Also, I am finally on Instagram. Follow me there too! instagram.com/setsunatt/
So, I am back to the freelance world again after almost 2 years of working a 9-5. Everyone keeps telling me that it'll be easy for me to find another job because I'm "so talented" but I don't think people understand how few and far between art jobs are. Especially in Colorado. Freelance is easy enough to pick up jobs with I suppose but not an actual 9-5 day job in the arts. *sigh*
Anyway, I will be posting some stuff that I did for them and some other work I have done as well to try to beef up my portfolio.
So sorry for disappearing like that! There's been a lot going on with my life and it's definitely affected my art. @___@
First off, I work an art job so I draw everyday for it, so a lot of the time, the last thing I want to do when I get home is draw for myself. It's sort of a resolution of mine this year to work on that more.
Another major thing that happened was as follows...
My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for 17 months now. I have PCOS and struggle with infertility so it's been a hard road and I have been seeing several fertility specialists to help with the issue. I recently (late November) started seeing a new one and he tested my blood to make sure that I could take a new medication safely. The results came back and I was 2.5 weeks pregnant. It was a complete shock because I didn't think it was possible for me that month. That, and when you've been trying month after month for as long as I have, it's surreal to hear something actually worked. lol. A few days later, I went in to test my blood again and they were expecting my HCG (thats the pregnancy hormone) to double. Instead, my HCG had dropped slightly, which pointed to a possible miscarriage. A went in another few days later and the same thing, so my doctor told me to expect to miscarry. Also, at the same time, I was having significant pain and discomfort coming from my ovary. (And also, the day after I found out I was miscarrying, my eldest dog got extremely sick and I had to put him down. So, I had a real shitty week) They tested my blood AGAIN (PS. I have had my blood tested just about every 2-4 days in the past 5 weeks) and this time the HCG went up, instead of continuing to drop like they were expecting. This highly concerned them, so I had to come in for an emergency ultrasound because they were now unsure if my pregnancy was in the uterus or not. The ultrasound didn't show where the pregnancy was but it did show that my ovary (the one that hurt) was 3 times it's size and that it was leaking fluid into my pelvic cavity. I was on fertility medication before I got pregnant, so that paired with being pregnant caused my ovary to go haywire. So, I was told to go on bed rest essentially because they were afraid my ovary could either rupture or twist on itself and cut off it's blood supply. I was also scheduled for a D&C surgery (which, to be completely honest, is basically like getting an abortion. But since my pregnancy was already deemed enviable and since there was no heartbeat yet, I wasn't getting rid of an actual fetus. Just a ball of cells at this point) because I was not miscarrying properly and this would help determine if my pregnancy was ectopic or not. They were also concerned about my ovary so most likely a D&C would stop the pregnancy and make my HCG levels drop, which would ultimately help my ovary. Anyway, I went in for the surgery and spent a few days recovering from it. When they tested my blood again, they were expecting the HCG to have dropped significantly and instead it was the highest it had ever been. This, combined with my D&C tissue being negative for conception material meant that my pregnancy was most definitely NOT in the uterus. I went in for another emergency ultrasound and FINALLY, we could see the pregnancy (I was about 4.5 to 5 weeks pregnant at this point) ... but it was in my fallopian tube. (For those that don't know, this is a very dangerous place to have a pregnancy. Because the fallopian tube is so small, eventually the pregnancy would most likely burst out of the tube and cause major internal bleeding. It would also permanently damage the tube and make future pregnancy even harder to achieve.) So, I was immediately sent to the hospital and was given methotrexate which is basically chemotherapy. This would stop the cells from reproducing and stop the pregnancy from progressing. Finally, last week, my blood results came back very close to 0, so I am most likely not pregnant any more as of this week. (I still have to test one last time tomorrow to be absolutely sure)
So yeah, that has been the rollercoaster of my life the past few months. And while I'm really sad about it, I am also just ready to try again. But I have to wait a few months for my body to recover before I can do that.
In other, much better news: I was accepted in to Denver Comic Con for 2015! So, after I finish my last 1-2 commissions, you will start seeing brand new work from me in preparation of that con.
Just a little update on my end!
I've been really busy lately with a big move. I finally sold and closed on my shitty condo that I've been living in for the past 5 years. Now, I am getting ready to move into my first real house! My hubby and I ended up buying a place that is only 10 miles from my work, so I am moving about 40-50 miles away from where I am currently. So, its a big move and it's to a smaller town, about half the size of the one I am in currently; it's also much further from Denver than I am used to but I am still excited about it. Anyway, I'm excited about the house too because its a 1936 Craftsman Bungalow on 18,000 sq feet of land (I've always wanted a craftsman house) and it's also business zoned so my hubby can open a business there like he's been wanting. Anyway, as I said, my condo closed the other day and I am not able to move into my new house until September 19.
So, currently I am living out of my suitcase in some family's houses until then. I don't even have room for my computer in some of the places I am staying at so I'm not so effective on the commission front right now and I'm sorry. But I will be back to finishing those last few when I get to the new house (or when I'm work, if I have downtime)
Hope to see you there!!
I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to go, but I am confirmed to be going to Fanimecon in San Jose, CA. I'll let y'all know exactly which table I'll be at once I get that info.
Since I am finding out pretty last minute, I am needing to rush and complete some stuff before the big event. I have already submitted 4 or so commissions to those who bought some. The rest, I will get returned in June, after the convention. Until then, I will be submitting art for the convention